Monday, May 10, 2010

Report from Day 1 of VT Challenge

Monday was the first day of my slightly-altered challenge based on the one put forth by Vegetarian Times. I packed my lunch and jogged with Emily after work, so lunch and exercise were handled. The third piece is meditation.

Before I ate lunch, I walked toward the chapel for my meditation break. The kindergarten class were dressed in their graduation robes and were singing a song about being all they could be. I walked past the chapel and toward the sanctuary, noting how lucky I was to work at a place with both a chapel and a sanctuary. Seriously, who has that luxury?

I picked a seat in the sanctuary, set my watch for five minutes, closed my eyes and breathed.


The sunlight through the window is bright. Isn't that weird? My eyes are closed, but the light is really bright.

Breathe.

Remember the first time you saw the Torah scroll in the stained glass? It's like one of those 3-D pictures.

Breathe.

Lynn suggested inhaling while counting to seven, holding for three, exhaling for seven, holding for three. I'll try that.

Breathe.

Good lord! That's not nearly enough oxygen! Didn't she say people with high blood pressure shouldn't do that? Do I have high blood pressure? I don't have high blood pressure. Wait. I'm supposed to be breathing.

Breathe.

Does the sanctuary smell funny? I think it smells a little funny. Wonder what that is.

Breathe.

I wonder how I'll write about this.

Breathe.

I wonder why I'm thinking about writing about an experience rather than allowing myself to experience the experience. That's messed up.

Breathe.

I wonder how long it's been? [Open eyes, glance at watch] ARE YOU KIDDING ME? Three minutes?!

Breathe.

I'm not happy with my time spent at work. This computer crap is hard, and there's no one to help me. That makes me want to avoid studying. I don't feel like I'm putting in an honest day's work. Now I'm sad.

Breathe.

I wonder how my friend who had surgery today is doing.

Breathe.

Does sending positive energy toward someone count as meditation? No. They're both good, but they're not the same. I should make time for both.

Breathe.

I wonder why I always think of God as male when I'm here. Do I feel this way in all sanctuaries, or just this one?

Breathe.

Maybe I should think about Queen Titania* beside me. I bet she'd be an awesome meditator.

Breathe.

Then again, God doesn't need to meditate, so that kind of breaks down.

Breathe.

You know, even if Titania was beside me, I bet I'd be focused on her and not on meditating. I suck at this.

Breathe.

I look at my watch. 4:57, 4:58, 4:59, 5:00.

Sigh. I'll try again today.


*Queen Titania is a character from James Christensen's Voyage of the Bassett, and she's the image I use to counterbalance the male image I have of God. It's not important that you understand this.

1 comment:

  1. You're doing fine - just keep at it. I'm proud of you for making this part of your challenge!

    Lynn

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